I learned about twerking today . . . or was it twinking? One of those.
I’ve been in China for seven years. That’s really not very long. It’s only one dog year. Wait. That’s backwards right? Either way. It’s not very long.
Now I have returned only to discover that this is exactly how long it takes for a nation to fall apart at the seams. That’s it. One dog year . . . or 49, I don’t know.
And for once politics has absolutely zilch to do with it. When I left for China (I can remember it like it was yesterday) the whole country was exactly polarized over every possible issue from human rights to school lunches and people were frenzied over what was happening in the Middle East with the fighting and the weapons of mass destruction and the never ending debate over whether or not we should be sending our boys and girls to fight. I also remember something about everyone bad mouthing the President.
It was actually a bit soothing to step off the plane and see that politics hadn’t changed a bit. Feels like home.
But what in the world did you people do to Hannah Montana?!!
When I left, Walt Disney was introducing her to the world as the quirky, average teeny bopper by day and uber famous pop star by night. The whole premise and plot of this super-mega hit show was that (and I quote wikipedia) “she conceals her identity from the public, other than her close friends and family.”
Did you catch that? “She conceals . . .”
Miley Cyrus ain’t concealin’ nothin’ anymore. In fact she has traded any semblance of concealing for this new twinking thing . . . or was it twerking? Whatever.
Point is . . . I left for a moment and you broke Hannah Montana.
And invented twerking.
Good, bad or deeply disturbing . . . culture never slows down.
And for those of you who can’t keep up, here are a couple of resources:
1. Twerking as it was explained to me via my younger, more twerk informed American colleagues via the New York Times article: Explaining Twerking to Your Parents.
2. Here’s the MTV interview where Hannah Montana explains that she was conspiring with Robin Thicke to, quote, “make history” at the Video Music Awards and also that she “didn’t even think about it.” Seven years ago we thought about it when we wanted to make history. I can’t leave you people alone.